These messages were sent while you were offline.
9:18 AM Amber: some kind of confirmation that you’re not dead or that’s everything’s okay would be really nice here because now I am really worried.
Date: Sat, Dec 27, 2008 at 3:22 AM
To: “Ms. Pez” < Amber@gmail.com>
Hi, everything is fine. I didn’t mean to worry you. Many things have been going on the past couple of days. Mainly, I have been sick… a rare thing that is not a lot of fun. I feel like have been sleeping 15 hours a day in 3 or 4 hours shifts. Between my not feeling well, my trying to solve my own problems and having no time to myself during the past few days I have been out of touch. How was your Christmas? Hope things are welll with you.
9:18 AM Pez: some kind of confirmation that you’re not dead or that’s everything’s okay would be really nice here because now I am really worried.
OH THANK GOD!!!! I THOUGHT WIFE CAUGHT YOU IN A BUNCH OF LIES AND I THOUGH THIS WHOLE THING WAS STARTING OVER AGAIN!!!! THEN I JUST WANTED TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Not thank God that you were sick by any means (of course not) but I am just SO THANKFUL, SO THANKFUL, SO THANKFUL, that everything’s ok. Holy smokes. You have NO IDEA how much I’ve been freaking out the last week. Last I talked to you was Monday and you were sounding so unsure about answering the multiple questions and these were my thoughts:
1) well, Wife must have found out and the inquisition is probably lasting all night long….that’s of course why he can’t get online to tell me
2) (next morning)-well…..hmmmm…oh no! She must have kicked him out of the house! OH MY GOSH!
3) well wait….if she kicked him out of the house he would’ve gone to his mom’s and she has internet….so that can’t be it.
4) Maybe he got in an accident!
5) Maybe he’s in the hospital!!! Should I call the hospital???? NO! I can’t do that….because Wife would be there and she would wonder how the hell I knew he was in the hospital.
6) (Christmas Eve night) I know what it is…I hurt his feelings and he’s just trying to not talk to me because that’s what he thinks I want. He’s trying to do the right thing….Well God bless his soul!…..but what a jerk because he’s not even telling me things are okay! Oh Thank God things are okay.
7) Well, I’ll still check my email just in case but I’m pretty sure he just won’t email me. Maybe I can corner him at church and force him to tell me if things are okay.
Not to mention God really used this time to kick my ars! I was so consumed with worry it was killing me. I literally couldn’t get away from the guilt and worry. About Christmas Eve is when I decided I can’t do this anymore (worry) and I just started praising God. So everytime worry came, I kicked it’s ass out! Then God showed me I really really really don’t want Bambi to lose trust in me especially after all this has happened with her opening up.
Yeah, so you probably don’t really care about all these crazy feelings I’ve had but wow,,,,,what a relief!
Okay. Switching gears. Well, I hope you are feeling much better and I’m sorry about you being stressed and sick and all stuff you’re having to deal with right now.
Okay, well I am going to Auburn today to do my mom’s side Christmas…except my mom won’t even be there because she’s got 45 plus inches of snow in Spokane.
Well. Hope your Christmas was good and hope wife and son are doing okay. You should drop a hint that she should email me if she hasn’t yet…but don’t get yourself into trouble.
p.s. oh thank God!